Where You at?

I have been asked a few times in the last couple of months since my daughter 'left the nest', when I am going to find someone and 'settle down'?

I want to say that if only it were that simple. If only I could magically meet the great guy that is meant for me. I wish fervently to just bump into him and our eyes meet and voila!!! Love!

Sadly, that is not MY life. I meet the hapless bumbling dude that would never ever leave the friend category. I meet and fall into brother love with the "I'm with my boo from HS, but I got chicks" dude who would never excite romance in me because he is a dog, but he's so sweet and reminds me of one of my brothers. I meet and instantly dislike the cornballs who don't even get that you're NOT interested or even that they are so, so wack so they keep coming~eelk. That is why my faith is sorely tested. Of course I want to be with the man who makes my skin tingle, but I tend to meet the mess that makes my skin crawl. I try, but I cannot settle. I do not think I have high expectations, but I do have expectations.

 I do want that man that opens doors and says romantic things, but that he is smooth and effortless in his seduction. So basically, I want a safe yet dangerous thugged out sensitive faithful, understanding personal trainer that has no interest in 2o something behavior and who worships the ground I walk on. I do no think that's too much. (well, ok; I left out that I want him to have a few tattoos and I prefer not light skinned because light skin men have multi colored penises~yes. We will talk!)

 BUT even if that's much, at least they are all personality and mannerism and appeal traits! Notice I did not mention money, (I mean I don't want a dude to carry me, but I think a safe yet dangerous, sexy thugged out sensitive faithful, brown skinned brother who worships the grounded I walk on and rescues puppies AND who has a few tattoos knows how to court a woman.) Notice I did not mention career. (I believe in continuous growth. Be happy and free as well as frivolous with your ambition, just be steady!!) See, I think my soul mate is out there, I believe it. I think I am too liberal minded with what I will tolerate in a man. IF he's the one. IF we have a connection. I just do not feel like exposing and giving myself to a man that I already know will not go the distance. And I know almost immediately. Love is instant. There has to be a spark; a connection, damn, can I get some GOOSEBUMPS?#?!!#?!

I will risk it all for a safe yet dangerous, sexy, thugged out, sensitive, tatted up, faithful, worshipping the ground I walk on, rescues puppies, brown skinned, even toned penis man... and nothing less. I mean seriously, I'm supposed to give the greatness that is I to a mediocre man that I simply am not attracted to just so I can say I have a man?

I know he is out there. AM I looking? No. I am ready though, and in the meantime, I refuse to get intertwined and caught up in a web of NO sir I am really not feeling you because you are unsafe AND dangerous, light skinned, unfaithful, doggish, insensitive, coarse and ghetto, with 2 jail tats that say 'thug life' and 'I shot the sherriff', who doesn't even know his own worth let alone recognize mine. No thanks, I'll wait...
Impatiently I might add

~Desperately Seeking Cracey (lol)